Wandering Werewolf
by AlbertaRose
Summary: The morning after, Remus Lupin must face the world all on his own. In a new place, he knows not where, he ponders what his life means now. Oneshot.


_So this is intended as a one shot. And I never thought I would write such a cheesy fic taking characters so out of their element. But it is meant to bring them a little closer to me. PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK, because that would mean the world to me._

_Since one of my favorite fanfic authors does silly disclaimers, I will put one up in Halfaslug's honor ;) Also from Halfaslug is the lovely tale of the Ottawa Werewolf ;) thank you for the inspiration!_

_Disclaimer: You know that trading guy, who managed to trade his way from a paper clip to a jumbo jet? Someday I will trade my way to owning Harry Potter. But until then, JK Rowling still has him._

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Remus woke up and stared at the bright blue sky above him. He had no idea where he was. He didn't really care. His heart felt like it had been ripped out back in England. As the memories hit him, he felt the need to disappear all over again. Like a ton of bricks hitting his body all at once. Like the top five worst full moons of his life, all wrapped into one. And for once, his misery had nothing to do with his affliction.

Brave, smart, funny James, gone.

Lily, sweet, gentle, amazing Lily, gone too.

Poor, blundering, brave Peter, dead.

Little Harry, still an innocent baby, orphaned.

And all because of Sirius.

His mind simply refused to understand how his dearest friend could have betrayed him like this. He had no way of understanding what to do with himself now. For the past four years, Remus had been tasked with resisting Voldemort. It had been an all consuming quest, not just for him, but for James, Lily, Peter and Sirius too. Well, maybe not for Sirius at all, Remus thought with another stab.

What exactly was he to do now? Last night, when Dumbledore had called him back from his mission, and explained everything he did not believe it. He could not. He had run. Like a coward he had run from everything, Hogwarts, his feelings and Britain itself. He remembered apparating away and farther than he ever had. For a small second, he was amazed he hadn't splinched himself. He had simply landed, laid down and closed his eyes.

He wondered where he was. It was warm, but a cool breeze was blowing. He was in a wheat field, that was clear. But he had no idea where. Still, his thoughts were safe wondering about something as safe as location. Everything else in his mind seemed to be screaming in pain.

Carefully he stood up. The wheat came up to his chest, and was a perfect golden color. He turned, looking for any sign of civilisation. None. In the distance, he saw mountains, but they were very far away. Sighing, he decided he could not stay here. Nor could he go back. He didn't want to go back. Harry was the only reason he could think of that might be something to look after, to care for, and he was to be raised by Petunia and Vernon Dursley. From the stories Lily had told him, he was going to be miserable. He, Remus Lupin had nothing in England left. He had nothing anywhere. His reason for living, his never ending fight against Voldemort was over. And he had lost everything that he had been fighting for. Remus slowly turned on the spot. He decided against apparating. He chose to walk.

For what seemed like hours, in the ocean of wheat, he walked. It truly seemed to stretch on forever. He wondered on which continent he had landed. Possibly which country. It was easier to think of that than of his reason for being here.

Just as the sun began to dip in the horizon, he came across a road. One strip of straight asphalt with no signs directing him where to go. Thinking was bad at this point. All his thoughts revolved around the same excrutiating circles and he didn't think he could take much more. He needed a sign to point him in the right direction. He needed a new mission, a new obssession to keep his thoughts safe. If Lily and James had died, he would have kept on fighting Voldemort. If Peter had died, he would have kept on spying on the werewolves for the Order. Even if Sirius had betrayed them, he would have kept on firghting. His biggest problem was that the one thing that could have distracted him, that could have given him a sense of purpose still, was gone too. Like all of a sudden his Earth had no gravity and he was floating with no where to go. So he turned left and started to walk along the shoulder of the road, hoping eventually a sign would come.

Why on earth would there be a road here, if there was no one to use it? Remus wondered as he walked. The sun was kissing the ridge of the mountains, turning the sky a beautiful pallet of peachy pinks and reds. It was starting to get cold, when he heard something other than the wind and the sound of his own thoughts. A old beaten truck, which may have been green once before it rusted over drove past him. Oddly enough, it stopped. Remus knew next to nothing about cars, and with another pang, thought of Sirius who had loved them. As he walked up to it, the driver side window came down. It took him a moment to register that it was on the wrong side from the ones he remembered in England.

"Need a ride?" the driver asked him as he came level with the window. It was a girl, no older than him. Her red hair, tied in two braids down the side of her face, reminded him painfully of Lily, though it was darker than Lily's had been. Her kind hazel eyes, reminded him of James, but they had more golden flecks in them than James'. It hurt to look at her. Seeing his dead friends in her features made him suddenly even more aware of what he had lost. Seeing another person for the first time since Dumbledore had told him. He wondered suddenly if it was just her, or if he would see his friends in everyone he met. The girl smiled at him and her warm smile made him feel safe, for the first time since leaving Hogwarts the night before. There was no way she was a Death Eater, let alone a witch, he reasoned. She was a muggle that had stopped to help someone on a lonely road, somewhere in the middle of nowhere.

"I was just heading into town for a drink. Never seen anyone walking out here." she added when he didn't say a word. Her accent was strange, something he had never heard before. It struck him again, how very far away from home he was."You look like you could use one. A drink, I mean." she said with another kind smile.

"Sure." he said, rounding the truck and climbing into the passenger seat.

"My name is Aislinn by the way." She said, starting the engine and pulling away from the shoulder.

"Remus."

"Where you from? Your accent is weird."

"Surrey." She looked at him blankly. "Britain?"

"Wow. What you doing all the way out here?"

She was kind, despite all her questions. Remus found himself warming to her. She had a nice smile.

"I'm not sure."

"Rough night?" How on earth could she see right through him like this? Carefully and casually, Remus put his hand on the handle of his wand, ready to draw at a moment's notice.

"Yeah. I guess you could say that."

There was silence for a long moment. Remus observed this Aislinn. Somewhere out west came the conclusion to his location, judging from her outfit. She was wearing a yellow button down shirt, and worn blue jeans. And a cowboy hat. He had only ever seen pictures of those, but he recognized it from the story books his mother had read to him as a child. She sat back as she drove, as though she had been doing it for years, even as young as she was. Remus tore his eyes away from her, and stared at the road ahead, but it was so bland, devoid of life that he wondered once again where he was. Clearing his throat, he braced himself to ask the stupidest question.

"Where am I?"

"We're almost in New Point."

"Er... Where is that?"

"Must have been a hell of a party." Remus only grunted. It was strange to think of celebrating now. He didn't feel like celebrating anything ever again. And yet, right now in Britain, everyone was celebrating. Everyone was glad of the fact that Voldemort was gone. No one except Remus was left to mourn the price it had come at.

"We're pretty small. Just south east of Lethbridge."

"Still have no idea where I am." he said, feeling both irritated and stupid.

"Where the hell did you fall from?"

"What?"

"How on earth did you get here, if you have no idea where here is?" God, this was going to be difficult. He wondered for just a moment telling her the truth, that he was a wizard who had apparated here to escape the pain of losing the five people in his life that mattered, but then he remembered the International Statue of Secrecy applied to the whole world, including here, where ever here was.

"Its a really long story. And I'd rather not get into it." It involves the death of my three dearest friends due the betrayal of my fourth and last friend on this planet, he thought and it was like someone had stuck a knife between his ribs at the thought.

"What country am I in?" he finally asked, just wanting answers.

"Canada." she said with a smile. He thought for a moment, trying to place it. Why did Hogwarts not teach geography?

"That is the big one right?" he asked, again feeling a little stupid.

"Second only to Russia. Colonised by French and the British, always overshadowed by the States. Largest producer of maple syrup." She said with a definite note of pride in her voice. Remus suddenly remember a werewolf case he read about. Something about a werewolf in Canada who had saved a school from a gas leak. He had lived and held down a job in a city called Ottawa, he thought. Maybe he wasn't so screwed after all...

"Er... where is Ottawa from here?"

"About three thousand miles that way." she said pointing straight ahead.

As they crested a small hill, a few rambled buildings came into view, their lights illuminating the darkening sky. Aislinn pulled into one of the four buildings and parked.

"Welcome to New Point." She said with a smile. "Come on, I'll buy you a drink. You look like you need it."

Inside the shabby pub, Aislinn said a brief hello to each of the four patrons, and ordered two drinks from the large barman, a man she called Clark. Remus didn't feel the stare of the other customers. They could stare all they liked. As Aislinn handed him a glass of brown liquid, he smiled at her for the first time. It was like the muscles in his face had forgotten the motion, had to be trained again. Remus thought of the last time he smiled. It had been just before Lily and James went into hiding, on Harry's first birthday. The tiny boy had been waddling around from one person to the next, and it was impossible not to smile at his joy and efforts. He didn't even have all his teeth yet, Remus thought with another pang. He grabbed the glass and downed the whiskey in it. It wasn't firewhiskey, but it still burnt on the way down.

"Easy there. Don't want to get lost again, do you?" Aislinn said with a smile. Remus smiled back, feeling a little looser already. He remembered last time he had had a drink. It had been last Christmas, at Lily and James'. When Harry had been asleep, the four Mauraders had gotten good and proper drunk to forget the recent loss of Gideon and Fabian Prettwett. That was a long time ago.

"You're a really quiet one." Aislinn said, pulling him out of his memories.

"I don't really know what to say." Or do, or think or feel anymore, he added mentally.

"You could start by telling me how the hell you ended up here."

For a long moment Remus considered her. He had only met this girl half an hour ago. But in that time, she had given him a ride, bought him a drink and made him smile for the first time in months. In half an hour, he trusted her. It seemed amazing that he could trust anyone right now. Maybe she was just one of those people, those people like Lily and Dumbledore, that you could not help but trust?

"There was a big war. Back where I am from, in Britain. And I lost... Everything."

"What war? Haven't heard anything on the news..."

"You wouldn't it was sort of... underground."

"Criminal wars?"

"Not exactly." she considered him, thoughtfully, but didn't push the issue further.

"What did you lose? Your house? Your girlfriend, or wife?" Remus suddenly smiled again. Of all the things she could have asked, it was the two things he never had to begin with.

"No. Friends. All my friends." The word, that had once brought him a rush of warmth now felt colder than stone.

"How?"

"They died. Murdered." he said sullenly. Why was she poking at him about this? Who was she to ask such questions? Angry all of a sudden, he stood up and went to order another drink from Clark the barman. But Aislinn followed.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked. And for your loss." Remus looked back into her eyes, and saw the genuine sadness and apology in them. He realised just how expressive her eyes were right then.

"That's two fifty, kid." Clark told him from across the bar, as he handed him fresh drink.

"Put it on my tab, Clark. And anything else he orders tonight." Clark nodded as he walked back down.

"Thank you." Remus said, looking back at her. Once again, he could not remember the last time he had been grateful.

"Tell me about them. Your friends. Maybe it will be good to talk about them."

And so Remus talked. In their quiet corner, of the quiet pub in a tiny town in the middle of nowhere, to a complete stranger, Remus spoke about James and Lily, how they had gotten together in school, and how perfect they were for each other, and about their son Harry. And he talked about Peter, always struggling along, but with a goodness in him, and a love for his role models. And then he spoke about Sirius, and how close he had been to him, the mischeif they had gotten into in school together. For more than an hour, Remus talked and reminisced about the happier times he had had with his now lost friends. Aislinn was an excellent audience, she laughed at the funny bits about their adventures in school, and awwed at the story of James and Lily's wedding. She had tears in her eyes when Remus told her Harry was an orphan now.

Before he knew it, Clark was shooing them out so he could close the bar, and Aislinn was leading the way back to her truck. Remus realised quite quickly how much he had drunk while recounting his stories and it was then he realized that he really had no place to go. He had no money to get a room somewhere, he had no way of getting any and he wondered if he wanted to. He was drunk and homeless and without a place to go. Aislinn spotted this problem at the same time he did.

"Come on. You can barely stand on your own two feet and I am to blame for that. You can stay at my place tonight."

With only the slightest moment of hesitation, Remus climbed into the cab of the truck again.

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Thank you for reading! Please leave a comment below!

PS. New Point is a made up town, but Lethbridge is real. also I realise November 1st is VERY late for wheat to still be out, but I liked that image. Maybe there was a chinook?


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